Based on a true story. So absurd it almost deserves copyright protection.
At the beginning of 2024 I sent $25k, in USDT, to a company that was supposed to provide a service. The service never happened.
A month later, I asked for a refund, and they admitted they owed it. No dispute, all good.
That’s where reason ended.
First came the email chorus: “We need an invoice.”
Then the classic sequel: “Our compliance team needs to review it.”
After weeks of “reviewing”, they unveiled a new plot twist worthy of a Kafka novel:
Anyone who’s ever used Binance knows how ridiculous that is. Binance sends from one of its internal addresses, not from the user’s wallet.
Fine, I said, let’s do it properly. Binance confirmed it could be manually allocated to my wallet. Problem solved, right?
Wrong. Months passed by. Binance later closed my account. I sent the company a new deposit address. I even offered my Bank of America account as a backup.
Both were rejected by their “compliance department.” Apparently, they had strict internal rules about not returning money.
And finally, the ultimate excuse, which should be patented for future use:
Yes, according to these self-proclaimed finance experts, the U.S. Treasury needed to personally approve and intermediate my refund. Janet Yellen had to babysit my $25,000 refund.
Eventually, in spring 2025 we signed a settlement agreement for $23,000 (due to unspecified "currency conversion fees"), payable within 72 hours. They ignored that too.
So I sued them: the company, its CEO, his nephew, his lawyer.
In court, they didn’t even deny the debt. They just repeated their mantra about “full compliance with U.S. and global regulatory bodies.” The judge, visibly unimpressed by their creative compliance theater, ordered them to pay $35k within thirty days, or start paying interest.
From $25,000 to $35,000.
A 40% premium for pure stupidity.
The moral? “Compliance” is the modern fig leaf of incompetence. It sounds respectable, feels important, and buys time, until a judge rips it off.
The business world is full of this kind of fake professionalism. Clowns who speak fluent buzzword but can’t do the simplest thing: honor an agreement.
And if you ever need a fresh excuse to delay payment, feel free to recycle this one:
Just make sure you know how the story ends.
At the beginning of 2024 I sent $25k, in USDT, to a company that was supposed to provide a service. The service never happened.
A month later, I asked for a refund, and they admitted they owed it. No dispute, all good.
That’s where reason ended.
First came the email chorus: “We need an invoice.”
Then the classic sequel: “Our compliance team needs to review it.”
After weeks of “reviewing”, they unveiled a new plot twist worthy of a Kafka novel:
Anyone who’s ever used Binance knows how ridiculous that is. Binance sends from one of its internal addresses, not from the user’s wallet.
Fine, I said, let’s do it properly. Binance confirmed it could be manually allocated to my wallet. Problem solved, right?
Wrong. Months passed by. Binance later closed my account. I sent the company a new deposit address. I even offered my Bank of America account as a backup.
Both were rejected by their “compliance department.” Apparently, they had strict internal rules about not returning money.
And finally, the ultimate excuse, which should be patented for future use:
Yes, according to these self-proclaimed finance experts, the U.S. Treasury needed to personally approve and intermediate my refund. Janet Yellen had to babysit my $25,000 refund.
Eventually, in spring 2025 we signed a settlement agreement for $23,000 (due to unspecified "currency conversion fees"), payable within 72 hours. They ignored that too.
So I sued them: the company, its CEO, his nephew, his lawyer.
In court, they didn’t even deny the debt. They just repeated their mantra about “full compliance with U.S. and global regulatory bodies.” The judge, visibly unimpressed by their creative compliance theater, ordered them to pay $35k within thirty days, or start paying interest.
From $25,000 to $35,000.
A 40% premium for pure stupidity.
The moral? “Compliance” is the modern fig leaf of incompetence. It sounds respectable, feels important, and buys time, until a judge rips it off.
The business world is full of this kind of fake professionalism. Clowns who speak fluent buzzword but can’t do the simplest thing: honor an agreement.
And if you ever need a fresh excuse to delay payment, feel free to recycle this one:
Just make sure you know how the story ends.
